an ode to cackles and good laughs

My favorite grainy photo. This is from a Kodak disposable camera.

I listened to Ashley Blaine's Trials to Triumphs podcast earlier this week, and Lena Waithe was her guest. During the conversation, Lena talked about her upbringing and how her grandmother shaped some of her early interests in film because she had the kind of grandmother who took her to different things, like movies. This conversation resonated with me, especially this week, as it's today's second anniversary of my Nana's passing.

My Nana was my girl, and honestly, to this day, she is still one of my favorite people. She was not only beautiful, but she was stylish, graceful, the voice of reason, the best person to gossip with, the best person to vent to, and the best person to laugh with because she cackled when she laughed, which always made me laugh more. She was also one of the most loving, supportive, and kind people I knew - she even came to every basketball game I had even though I sucked (running and running with glasses back and forth wasn't really my thing). I've written about her passing a few times in this newsletter, here and here, and to be honest, this sentiment still exists for me:

“It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” - Alfred, Lord Tennyson

One of the biggest things I’ve learned throughout these two years is about time. People often talk about time because it moves so fast, and I think when someone passes, it seems like time is ticking on two different clocks. For people mourning, you’re living in the past and the memories, but time in the present continues to move along even if you are mourning. It’s a trip, honestly, but I think time also helps you move through your grief, perhaps.

While I’m sure I will always mourn my Nana and the experiences I won’t be able to have with her in the physical sense, e.g., having kids, getting married, buying a house, and finally getting my sleek Volvo SUV like hers, I find comfort in knowing she’s watching over me, and that all of the things she taught me through my life I’ll be able to apply. Also, I find comfort in knowing that 2/22 is an angel number that means:

“The 222 meaning, as it shows up in your life, is the angel’s way of letting you know to have faith and trust that they path you’re on is the correct one.”

So with that, I will continue living in my grandmother’s image, meaning I will continue to be kind, joyful, gracious, organized, and beautiful - because honey, there’s not much else to do (I’m kidding… maybe).

If you are grieving, or even if you’re not, there are two book suggestions that I thought were great:

• Nicole Avant’s - Think You’ll Be Happy: Moving Through Grief with Grit, Grace, and Gratitude is a beautiful book; it also has a very beautiful interview with her on the Trials and Triumphs podcast.

• Marisa Renee Lee’s - Grief is Love: Living with Loss - again a beautiful read

That’s that on that, here are a few things I thought were worth sharing this week:

First, things to listen to:

I loved Ericka Pittman’s interview on Earn Your Leisure. Carmelo was on Dwayne Wade’s new podcast, The Why, and I love their friendship. As an adult, my skin has been struggling, so I found this episode of The Dream Bigger Podcast with guests Danielle and Kayleigh, founders of CLEARSTEM, to be great.

Now, things to read:

Doing what the kids do and downloading plastic surgery apps. On the opposite end of plastic surgery apps, here’s what at 37 Year-Old face looks like without filters - enjoyed this. It is very interesting to see how much people pay for their skincare. Since November, I think I’ve only spent $21 on skincare and $30 on makeup. Great profile on Jeffrey Wright. What it’s like to live in the Bay Area on $13,200 a month. I found this breakdown to be pretty interesting.

& something that doesn’t fit in either category:

After countless budgets and budget apps, I finally found the best budget template, and it’s under $10 currently.

That’s it for this week! I’ll catch you next week.