A Few Little Things
Hi. I’m happy to be back and hope you missed me.
Christmas is so close and no, I haven’t started Christmas shopping. I’m a pretty meh gift giver. I like to give experiences, or books and if you don’t read, you’ll get a sentimental card and that’s about it. I do want to do better this year, so I’ve committed to giving a few books to my family, and a few little thoughtful gifts for my best friends.
Speaking of Christmas coming up, I just wanted to throw a little bird out there – or however the expression goes, that the last two weeks of December I will be going on a little hiatus to celebrate the holidays. I’ll be back in full swing in the new year. Before then, I will be finishing my best of the year playlist to share with you all, but in the meantime, check out my playlist for the Cat Daddy’s. It’s a mix of golden oldies, and 90’s Guy-ish jams. Let me know what you think.
Additionally, since the year is coming to an end, I wanted to use my next few newsletters to highlight some of my favorite things from the year. For this first one, I’m sharing articles that I read from Pocket.
I do think Pocket should sponsor me because I’m always out here spitting game about them. I also gave myself a limit to how many articles I could share BECAUSE I’m a reader, and I tend to also go overboard.
Let me know your thoughts, and your favorite article reads of the year:
Why Aren’t More Women Having Kids? Ask Us About Our Student Loans
It seems like this year, women having kids has been one of the topics I’ve been reading about most. Not sure if it’s because I’m getting to the age to start thinking of this stuff, or that a few of my friends are having kids but it’s been a reoccurring theme in my reading journey. I don’t have student debt, but get the sentiment:
“Plenty live paycheck to paycheck and can’t imagine setting aside even an extra $100 a month for necessities like diapers, formula, and doctors’ visits. They lack the small fortune required for suitable childcare. Student loan debut is the reason 6 percent of millennials are postponing having kids, and why 13 percent of 20-to 45-year-olds don’t want kids at all, according to recent polls.
A Dying Young Woman Reminds Us How to Live
“We control the effort we have put into living.”
Why we Can’t Get Enough of Scams
Literally, I love them all expect Fyre festival.
“Here’s my personal theory: With the biggest scammer of all well into his first term as president of the United States, seemingly invulnerable to being caught in any meaningful way, many of us are gagging to see justice (or even just shame) meted out elsewhere. It’s a temporary salve, a quick dose of serotonin that evaporates upon reading the news.”
We Built This: Glory Edim Is Building an Empire with Books by Black Women
I grew up as a reader and read so many kinds of books. When I first discovered Well Read Black Girl, I was like YASSS here’s my tribe and loved this profile of the founder, Glory.
“Who are the people telling the stories? Who are the people creating the technology? Who are the people changing the algorithms? It is so important that black women are always in the room and working across genres to make that happen and to imagine new worlds. I really think about imagining greater things for the future. And without that imagination, it’s going to be stagnant. We’re not all the same.”
Why are Young People Pretending to Love Work?
Not me. “Millennials, Ms. Petersen argues, are just desperately striving to meet their own high expectations. An entire generation was raised to expect that good grades and extracurricular overachievement would reward them with fulfilling jobs that feed their passions. Instead, they wound up with precarious, meaningless work and a mountain of student loan debt. And so, posing as a rise-and-grinder, lusty for Monday mornings, starts to make sense as a defense mechanism.”
Have We Hit Peak Podcast?
Yes, yes, we have. “Anyone can start one and so anyone who thinks they can start one will do it,” said Nicholas Quah, who runs an industry newsletter called Hot Pod. “It’s like the business of me.”
“Being a podcast host plays into people’s self-importance,” said Karen North, a clinical professor of communication at the Annenberg School for Communication and Journalism at the University of Southern California. And it projects that importance to others. Public speaking and consulting gigs now often go to “the person who’s the expert and has the podcast,” she said.
Tracee Ellis Ross Just Shared Her Best Tips for Staying Young in A New No-Makeup Instagram Video
This is why Tracee is love for me. Here are her tips for staying young: giggle as much as possible, get your sleep, drink so much water, have as much sex as possible, and love with a full and open heart. Great tips.
Love is Not a Permanent State of Enthusiasm: An Interview with Esther Perel
“Marriage is an aggregate of multiple narratives. It belongs to the people who are in it, but it also belongs to the people who are supporting it and living around it: family, friends, community.”
[On a working definition of love] “It’s a verb. That’s the first thing. It’s an active engagement with all kind of feelings—positive ones and primitive ones and loathsome ones. But it’s a very active verb. And it’s often surprising how it can kind of ebb and flow. It’s like the moon. We think it’s disappeared, and suddenly it shows up again. It’s not a permanent state of enthusiasm. I’m thirty-five years in a relationship, I practice. And I have two boys—I practice. It’s not just romantic love. I think that definition today of love—“you are my everything”—where you really see it, this complete exaltation, is in wedding vows.”
Like everything else in life, your romantic relationship evolves with age and time
“A big part of the work of loving and being loved is making peace with the inevitability of change.”
“Vulnerability may prompt disagreements and real discussions about the future, but after the dust settles, there’s often a period of stability. “You’re figuring out how to work together,” says Dr. Ivankovich. “Partners stop trying to change one another and instead celebrate their differences.”
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